Category Archives: Take Charge Goals

Jim Brickman and Going to Events Alone

So you may remember three or four months back when I talked about purchasing a ticket to a Jim Brickman concert to be used as a reward for meeting some goals (or to be given away if I didn’t meet the goals).  While all goals were not met, I felt I did well enough to deserve this treat.

Last Friday I had a wonderful time sitting in a very fancy seat at the theater enjoying one of my favorite pianists perform.  It was lovely.  And…going alone was not nearly as dreadful and I have imagined it might be all these years.  In fact, I quite enjoyed it. Don’t get me wrong–whenever the option is available I would much prefer to go with friends, but it was nice to know that I don’t ever have to miss out on something just because someone else isn’t available.  In fact, four of my friends were at the performance and I visited with them during intermission and after the performance and two of them were kind enough to walk me to my car (the only thing that is not so grand about going to something like this alone–making your way back to your car in the dark of night by yourself–scary!).  Thanks girls!

Also in my previous post (all those months ago) I mentioned that I was giggling a bit about going to a concert with “romance” in the title all by myself–but that maybe I was ready to think about putting myself out there a bit more as far as dating goes and being open to the possibilities (being overweight has been a real barrier to that for me–whether real or imagined).  I decided to get on eHarmony over the long weekend when they had free communication and just see what was out there.  I’ve decided that while I have  a couple of very apparent flaws that my stand in my way–I’m a pretty good catch, AND  there are still some very nice available men.  Who knows, maybe one of these days I might be willing to do more than chat anonymously with random people and really put myself out there.  🙂

If you get the chance to see Jim Brickman on tour, you should.  The concert was great!



These four words instantly instill fear and anxiety in any girl who has ever struggled with her weight and simultaneously has the need to wear a work uniform, a team t-shirt, etc. where the advertised size is “one size fits all.”  My response to this is usually a very skeptical “We’ll see,” complete with eye roll and a deep sigh—all the while running 80 excuses to leave the situation through my anxiety ridden brain. 🙂

Why then, have I fallen into the “one size fits all” fitness trap?  For some reason I have taken myself down a path that has provided me with many days and night of feeling like a failure by trying to force myself into a particular work out program or routine that has worked for someone else and just doesn’t seem to fit the bill for me.   Don’t get me wrong.  I think probably any program out there could work for any person as long as the two are in synch.

What I am learning is that I am the expert on me (novel thought, I know 😉 ).  I know what feels right.  I know what my physical capabilities are.  I know what my limitations are.  I know what the right fit is for my temperament and personality in the current moment.  If I’m honest, temperament and personality play into this equation a whole lot more than I would have thought.

And guess what?  It is OK to try something and decide you don’t like it or it isn’t working for you right now.  You can keep trying programs on for the right fit, just like you can try on different sizes and styles of clothing to make sure you find what fits and flatters you best.

I’ve been in a pattern for a while now of beating myself up for not meeting my own expectations and it just dawned on me that I don’t have to do what everyone else is doing or what I think I “should” be doing based on my view of the external world.  I’m smart enough to take the tools given to me and design what will be best for me.  After all, I know me better than anyone else in the world.

It just gets better from here!