What we tell ourselves…
“Whatever you hold in your mind on a consistent basis is exactly what you will experience in life.” ~Anthony Robbins
I believe this. Unfortunately, I don’t necessarily practice it. I have a really bad habit of berating myself. Most of the time I keep these thoughts to myself, but there are times when I actually vocalize them and say disparaging things about myself to myself. It’s not a good practice.
I really believe that we become what we repeatedly think about or focus on. In fact, my struggle with my weight, in many ways, is living proof that we become what we think about. I sincerely believe that I would not have become so overweight if I had not had a running dialog going 24/7 in my head that was filled with all sorts of negative comments about my physical appearance, self control, and general lack of worthiness to be anything but fat.
I know I’m not alone in this. I know lots of other people face this same demon—many of them for the same reasons I do and many for a variety of other reasons.
I think I’ve mentioned before that I’m seeing a Naturopathic Physician to help me with some of my physical ailments. Things seem to be going quite well. One “goal” that he gave me was that I need to be kind to myself. It seems that every time I go into see him, we end up talking about things I don’t necessarily want to talk about. Things that I have pushed down pretty deep for a lot of years. Things that fuel my negative self-talk. I’m not quite sure how we end up there…I’m pretty guarded with that stuff. I’ve actually decided to call him the Subtle Phsychologist. He says he’s an MD, but….I always leave feeling like I’ve been in therapy.
I’ve been doing better in a lot of ways, but I made a comment as I was leaving his office a few weeks ago and I was able to really hear what it sounded like. Mostly it was just a poor choice of words, and I’m grateful that I tripped over my words so that I could actually hear out loud the drivel that I listen to all day/every day. He commented on it. Before the sentence was even out of my mouth I was able to hear how ugly and vile it really was. It made me sick. No wonder I’ve had such a hard time seeing the good in myself if I have that ugly negative voice playing in my head 24 hours a day.
I’ve recently purchased a small journal that I think will be helpful in keeping me focused on the good. I’ll post some pictures of it in a few days. In this journal I will list some things that I love every day. My goal is to make at least one or two of them each day specific to my physical being.
The other night I was talking about this with some friends. One of them had a lesson on being kind to one’s self at a Weight Watchers meeting. That night we took a few minutes and went around the room and had to say something nice about ourselves. It was a good exercise for me to do this and to do it in front of other people.
Has negative self-talk ever been an issue for you?
Do you have anything that you do to steer yourself away from negative self-talk?
I’d be interesting in hearing strategies that have worked for others.